Editor: Everyone cannot avoid facing their parents and illnesses. How can they make the last mile of life less bumpy and make those physical and mental preparations? Because of the international meeting, Yang Jiamin, who has been a resident service...
Editor: Everyone cannot avoid facing their parents and illnesses. How can they make the last mile of life less bumpy and make those physical and mental preparations? Because of the international meeting, Yang Jiamin, who has been a resident service member for more than 4 years since his experience in zero experience, also made her seem to have prepared her old age in advance. She said: It is not scary to be old. As long as you do a good job of psychological construction and face it with a right attitude rather than escape, you can reach it safely.
Everyone likes to be a full and respectful life in the old age, but there are also many people who have many unrealistic imaginations and fears about old age. How can they live better and more freely in their twilight years?
{9999}{9999}Yang Jiamin, who works in writing, worked as a home service member for more than 4 years in an accidental meeting. Originally, she just wanted to conduct a field survey on the writing topics, but unexpectedly she had a profound physical and mental meeting.
"Birth, old age, sickness and death are the necessary paths for everyone's life, but we can choose what kind of mentality to complete it." Yang Jiamin said.
My mother died of cancer and was not ready to face her old age, sickness and deathBefore she was in contact with the service, Yang Jiamin passed away shortly after she passed away. "I felt that this seemed like a clue in the dark, which supplemented the life scores that I had not yet completed."
Yang Jiamin's mother was suffering from lymphoma and found that it was the end of the stage, and it only took three months from cancer to death: "In a very short time, I quickly After a process of old age, illness and death with my best person, I was unfamiliar with me. No one told me how to deal with it. It was like going to the front line to fight in a state where there was no weapon. In fact, it was very at a loss. "
Yang Jiamin recalled that at that time, because it was no longer suitable for extreme treatment, my mother chose to receive peace care at home, but if she had sudden symptoms, she still had to go back to the hospital for emergency treatment. "That was the time when my son was sitting in the most frequent car."
Not only that, with the malignant body condition, my mother gradually couldn't take care of herself, and Yang Jiamin, the only living with her, became the main caregiver. "At that time, I often had to help my mother go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. I also asked her if she wanted to wear diapers, but my mother refused. Later, I became a residence service and understood that sometimes it was not as convenient as the caregiver, but she also had to consider the mood and intention of the caregiver."
Later, Yang Jiamin, who usually went to the library and was also used to sitting in a fixed position, because there was also a middle-aged woman next to her who always sat in the same position. After chatting, I realized that the other party was a residence service. "I always feel that I made a lot of mistakes when taking care of my mother, and maybe I want to use this opportunity to relieve some doubts and regrets."
The problem of caring for dementia is to treat the other party rather than sympathize with the work of a service member. Yang Jiamin's first body is: "Careman" It is definitely not a warm and pleasant scene that everyone imagines to be calm in middle age, but a battleground."Among the cases served by Yang Jiamin, 60% of them are dementia patients with varying degrees of severity. "We must learn to calm them down many emotions and try to understand them. There are various reactions from ordinary people; not to mention that they often share various strange and dirty things, and some dementia even have violent tendencies. "
"Sorry is easy, but it is difficult to treat the same." She once met a dementia girl who would pick up all the things around her and bite them, "One time, At first I couldn't understand why, but later I realized that maybe she had a way of chewing her mouth because her sensory awareness function had deteriorated, and biting with her mouth might be the way she could only recognize objects, just like a child." Finally, she bought a pacifier and bitten it to her aunt with her family's consent, and solved the problem.
"Sometimes, dementia people are unable to understand the situation in front of them, sometimes they think I am a thief at home, or sometimes they talk to the patient's spouse, and they think I am a mistress, and they are very angry to take me out."
When she faced the dementia people who could not communicate with common sense, she felt frustrated and even a little angry, but later she went to her position to think: if everything around her becomes strange, does not recognize the people around her, or cannot handle daily life, she will definitely be very worried and afraid. "The so-called care or care is not a good person, but a reason and objectivity."
The care work of life and death is the uncommon joy of lifeAlthough there are many hardships that are not humane to the outside world, and also face various situations of patients and families, Yang Jiamin believes that she has done the most valuable work.
"I once cared for a low-income aunt who had cancer. Because she applied for government long-term care services, she would sometimes accompany her to see a doctor. One day, because there were many people waiting for the diagnosis, she exceeded the prescribed number of time for illness. She was embarrassed to pay me money and buy something for me to eat, but she actually had no money. That feeling made me feel very touched."
Working in caring for her also made her feel sad about her life. "Many dementia may suffer when she is young. Have a good job or academy, but at the end of my life, what they need most is not money, but people who accompany him and care about him." Yang Jiamin said that she once cared for a girl named Dong Niang who lives in a five-star ward. "But it was actually me who enjoyed those equipment in the end, but I couldn't feel it."
"My father passed away while I was a service member. At that time, although I immediately gave up my work and went through, I still couldn't see him for the last time.. At first I was very regretful and even doubted myself: If taking care of others makes me unable to accompany my father at the last moment, is this job intentional? ”
Later, the nursing staff who was responsible for taking care of his father told Yang Jiamin: Many medical staff have such experiences. Although they may not be able to take care of their own family, there are also others taking care of him, so she is very grateful: "I think the value of the caregiver is to share this responsibility." Let the family keep their lives as usual and not be dragged down, just like a life community. "
The care after 50 years old should be prepared for three psychological preparations for those who are 50 years old, and start to take care of the current and future years old, what psychological preparations should they do?1. Make good mental preparations, parents will be in a state of condition at any time
"If you want to say what this job will bring to me, I think: if you have a 50-year-old family, you must first build and prepare for your psychological development. The health of the elderly will be in sudden situations at any time, or you may suddenly not remember who you are or even fall down suddenly." Yang Jiamin said.
2. Don't burn yourself without stopping
In addition, she also reminded that if there are people at home who need long-term care, "Don't burn yourself without stopping. No matter whether it is a family or a caregiver, it is very important to let go of some innocence of psychological disorders and set a stop. It is very important to ask for help in time. Now the government has actually provided a lot of long-term care resources, but many tragedies are caused by the fact that the family does not seek help from the outside world, and in the end they can't continue."
3. You must meet friends near your home
"If you don't want to end up alone, you must establish an international network with landlords. You often participate in neighborhood activities. Sometimes, family members, neighbors and even often run here may provide real-time assistance than children from the remote. Many people who die alone first discovered that they were the real estate developers because the time has come, and there is no rent." Yang Jiamin said.
I have also come to the second half of my life after 50s. At present, Yang Jiamin has already realized his arrangements for his retirement: "If I go to the day when I cannot live independently, I will go to the nursing home. I don't have to be overly worried about old age, but I should not know anything. But when I still have the ability, I should take care of the people and things around me as much as possible, and then I may establish a cycle of goodness."
Original text: Read countless times of taking care of the on-site care of my old age! Service member Yang Jiamin: 3 psychological preparations that should be done after the age of 50
